We Really are a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts!

How often have you heard your family member or friend say, “I love people watching.”?  If you are honest with yourself, you may realize you are also a people watcher.    And, really there is a good reason for it.  As far as sideshows go, people are, and do the strangest things. Sometimes funny, sad, heart warming and in many cases, just plain stupid.

If we take just a seven day period it is interesting what we find people doing. So in order to run my people watching experiment, rather than sitting at an airport and looking like potential stalker, I decided to see what has been reported by other people watchers.  What I found was sick, funny, weird, stupid and even heart-warming.

First the sick.  In the world of strange romance, a South Carolina man,  Rodell Vereen was sentenced Wednesday after pleading guilty to buggery. A judge also ordered Vereen to get counseling and to stay away from the Lazy B Stables when he is released.   You see, he was charged with having sex with a horse that was being stabled at Lazy B.  Being particular in mates, Vereen had a penchant for one member of the equine species.  The owner noticed her horse acting funny, so she decided to install a hidden video camera.  In the middle of the night she caught Vereen consummating the relationship.  This was not the first time he was caught with this filly; two years earlier he was found sleeping in her stable snuggled in the hay.  Odd, Vereen, is an anglicized spelling for the German word Verein, which means a union or association.  With what, the courts are still trying to decide.

As weird as some animal lovers are, a 39-year-old man is approached and asked,  “Is that a ferret in your pants or are you just glad to see me.”  With that Rodney Bolton pulls out his weapon from his drawers and points it directly at a 17-year-old pet-shop workers face.  The animals hisses and bites the young fella.  Since this happened in Florida where they take their personal protection seriously, Bolton is charged with brandishing a concealed "special” weapon and shoplifting.  I wonder if the ferret was loaded?

Then from the world of weird we go to just sad.  On Halloween night, a man dresses up for a party. He takes himself out for what is going to be a night to remember.  Wanting to send a message of responsibility, he dresses himself up as a roadside breathalyzer complete with a reading warning all drivers of the legal limit.  Four hours later, he is pulled over by the police still in costume.  He is arrested, and within 40 minutes blows over the legal limit, still dressed for success!

Not to be outdone, a woman only 100 miles away, in Granston, Wisconsin, 49-year-old Mary Strey, after an evening of binge drinking is driving down the interstate.  Worried for her safety and the safety of others on the highway, she picks up her cell phone and calls 911.  She connects and states, "someone really drunk is driving down Granton Road." When asked which direction the drunk is traveling Mary says, “they are going, um....”  The operators says, “are you behind them.” to which Mary replies, “I am them...” With that the 911 operator finally convinces her to pull over, stop and turn on her four-way flashers so the police could find her.  A few minutes later, the police arrive and arrest Mary for drunk driving.  She is booked into a cell next to a funny dude wearing a breathalyzer costume.  We really have to get these two together.

Two days later stupid checks in for action.  In Cyprus, a Moreno Tavares Lizason was arrested after leaving a commercial airline.  No, he did not quit a job as an airline steward, Moreno just got up from his seat on an Airbus A320, a 150 passenger jetliner, and decided to deplane.  The problem was the jet was already heading down the runway for take-off when he opened the rear emergency hatch and decided to slide down the chute.  Once on the ground Moreno ran, jumped a fence and was arrested on the other side.  His excuse, he says he wanted to test the aircraft's safety features.  Everyone needs a hobby.

But the heart-warming treat for the professional people watcher come to us from Colorado Springs. Two weeks ago 88-year-old Martha Michel, who has been walking around a nursing home in memory of her deceased husband has hit a milestone. Martha and her husband Lester Michel were the perfect couple and spent much time just walking.  You see, after his death in 1998 she dedicated a daily routine of walking, as her and her husband had made a point of doing each day around the Namaste Alzheimer Center.  Her dedication and love for her husband resulted in Martha clocking in her 10,000th mile this weekend which is the same as walking across Canada nearly three times.

Yes, many people tend to show us their bad side as these former examples of Darwinian science have proven, but if you 'people watch' long enough you are able to separate wheat from the chaff as exampled by Martha Michel.

Maybe Mr. Vereen's better half can run laps for him.