The Enabler

‘Kids will be kids,‘ can be heard coming from the mouth of a person in authority, when discovering some young’uns have caused damage in your neighbourhood. It tends to be used to trivialize a problem, so that the victim will not insist on affirmative action. Yes, kids will be kids and things don’t change. All we need to do is wait until they grow up, right? But the problem with that logic is that others follow in their footsteps.

Recent events have brought to the surface a problem of bullying in our schools. Yes, being teased or embarrassed in school tends to be part of growing up, but when it comes to being bullied, the harassment goes beyond teasing, or even humiliation.

By definition a bully is a person who hurts, frightens or torments a weaker or smaller person. The fact is that all schools have bullies and because of their activities, children in our schools will be tormented on or off school grounds. It could happen inside the school, classroom, school yard, school bus and even online in chat rooms and social websites. It will happen anywhere a bully has the ability to make contact with their intended target or can manipulate others to do their bidding. But the interesting point is that a bully is not necessarily just a child or even a teenager. Bullies tend to grow up into adults and the behaviour continues into their workplace.

When the school bully confronts a child, the first thing the target of his or her aggression looks for is someone to intervene. But when no help comes, in many cases the victim keeps quiet, stewing in their humiliation because they may feel nothing will be done. The attitude and policy of the individual school can create an atmosphere that conveys to the victim, “keep quiet, they will just blame you, or worse, call you into the principals office.” How a teacher or administrator deals with the victim or the bully, goes a long way in preventing the behaviour from continuing. It can either convey to the school body that bullying will not be tolerated, or that bullying is condoned, or that it is just part of the school culture.

A 2006 study by the Government of Saskatchewan on bullying in schools, revealed some interesting facts. Former S/Sgt. George Anderson of the RCMP, when interviewing one teacher stated, “If a school tells you that they don’t have a problem they are lying.” The study showed that 71% of teachers said they usually intervene with bullying problems but only 25% of students report that teachers intervene. This is a clear indication that many schools don’t acknowledge or recognize when one of their students is being tormented. In essence, it is a strong indication that the faculty in some schools have become the enabler of bullying.

The effects of bullying can be long lasting, both for those who bully and those who are victimized. It has been shown that bullying behaviour during childhood is closely associated with future antisocial behaviour and criminal activity in adolescence and adulthood. Tormented students have reported symptoms of depression, anxiety, loss of self-esteem and occasionally, increased levels of aggressive behaviour. Even worse, where the schools have enabled bullying to thrive, there have been suicides as a result.

In a recent CBC report, Dawn-Marie Wesley, 14, of Mission, B.C., after constant bullying by three girls at school, left a suicide note that said, "If I try to get help it will get worse. They are always looking for a new person to beat up and they are the toughest girls. If I ratted they would get suspended and there would be no stopping them. I love you all so much." Dawn-Marie's younger brother found her in her bedroom where she had hanged herself with a dog leash. Incidents of suicide resulting from bullying are not common, but in more than a few cases in Canada, bullying has lead to the victim using death as a last resort.

It has been eloquently put by one teacher in our district that, “teachers wear many hats. Within the span of one school day we are teachers, counsellors, role models, coaches, supervisors, disciplinarians, nurturers, support systems, tutors, or just friendly faces to our students.” Teachers are also the first line of defence for victims of bullies. With all these hats, it must be recognized that in order to create a positive learning environment for the students, the students must feel safe. When a parent drops their child off at school, they are fully aware that teachers are more than educators. With that much power over their child comes great responsibility, and teachers need the support of not only the parents but also the school system they work in to create that safe environment.

In any case, bullying has been recognized throughout Canada as a serious problem, and it is necessary for each school to actively pursue a solution. It does no one any good to wait until the bully moves on because as we know, ‘kids will be kids’ and when one bully leaves another fills their boots. The problem will not just go away, it needs to be removed.